I went to the crosswalk as usual but on my way back home I noticed an elderly woman coming in my direction but she crossed the street back and forth a couple of times before she got to me. Was she looking for a house? Was she lost? She was carrying a bag from the convenience store, and the only one in the direction she was coming from was a long way off. At any rate, when she started into the street again I waved her back onto the sidewalk and said good morning as I approached. I tried to make conversation with her asking her where she was headed and where she was coming from but she didn't seem inclined to give any information and headed into the street again. A VERY DANGEROUS STREET with an upcoming narrow blind bend. I decided to accompany her back towards the school asking if I could carry her bag for her as she'd begun to start wailing about how she was so tired. When I asked her name or questioned her more she got very defensive and told me to just leave her alone. She sat down in the sidewalk a couple of times and started crying. Something was not right...
I called Tetsu on my phone and asked him to come in the car as I was walking towards the school again with an elderly Obaachan, but the Obaachan got very upset at me for calling someone and kept waving me away and telling me to her leave her alone. I tried distracting her by telling her about my job at the school but she didn't seem to know there was a school nearby... By that time Tetsu arrived and I thought, "Good. He has experience dealing with the elderly... He can figure out if this lady needs help."
But the lady wouldn't talk with Tetsu and ran out into the street into a path of a car as I dragged her back by her sweater which infuriated her even more. She stomped off yelling at us to leave her alone. Instead I followed her while Tetsu called the police.
Oh, was she upset with me! She peered at the name-tag I have hanging around my neck and screamed.
"Your name is Tanya Watanabe! I'm going to remember that! I'm going to tell the police that you are bothering me!"
Well, that was good. Now we both wanted the police.
I ended up following behind her quite a ways and she turned off onto a narrow path going through the fields. Tetsu had gotten out of his car and told me to keep following the lady and he would wave down and direct the policeman when he got there. But partway through the field the lady sat down on the bank and just mumbled and cried and I stayed quite a distance away from her with my back turned waiting to see if she was going any further.
Finally the policeman arrived and he took over but he couldn't get any more information out of the Obaachan either. She either didn't know or didn't want to tell anyone her name or where she lived. Tetsu went off to a nearby facility to see if one of their elderly had "escaped" but he came back saying they weren't missing anyone at the facility. The lady was crying and moaning by this time and still wouldn't talk to the policeman and so he finally called for a backup and pretty soon we had a bigger police car and two more policemen. This did not make the lady happy. And then a couple from a nearby house came out to see if they could help and when the wife said she was a nurse at a convalescent home, she took over talking to the lady and reassuring her (and surreptitiously checking the back tab of the lady's sweater to see if there was a name. Nope none.) The Obaachan was getting more and more excited and hauled off and hit the nurse in the face a couple of time (no harm done) and finally the three policemen decided they'd have to forcibly put the lady in the police car. They made sure though that we four witnesses were aware that they'd warned the Obaachan a number of times and that no abuse was being involved. It took 5 people to carry the screaming, kicking lady and get her situated in the police car and finally an hour and a half after all this had started we all disbanded.
This morning the local policeman reported to me that the Obaachan was from the neighborhood near the school and she might even have been able to have gotten home by herself... Which made me question my decision to have called Tetsu, to follow her despite her curses and telling me to leave her alone...
On the other hand, the policeman pointed out that she obviously had SOME dementia issues and some mental issues too with her anger, her refusal to give anyone her name, her violence and emotional outbursts and the way the whole situation got out of hand when it could have been easily averted if she'd just let anyone know her name... And as she had been wandering back and forth into the street then yes, I had been correct to worry about her and call someone about her safety. That made me feel better and I hate to think how I'd have felt if she'd been hit by a car if I'd done nothing...
It is a fact that the aged population is ever increasing in Japan... Since I started blogging Tetsu and I have "helped" three elderly people... The energy involved, the questioning of my decision process, the heart pounding reaction to all the cursing and screaming... I was exhausted by the time we got home... I'm sure the lady was pretty exhausted too...
If she had been my mother I would be very grateful that you took an interest and helped.
ReplyDeleteEvery day on TV and the newspapers there are reports of old people being the victims of fraud. So MANY elderly people are cautious, suspicious and afraid of being approached by strangers. Then there are people who are just angry with EVERYTHING, with life, God, their family, the government, Covid19, the future, the economy, the weather, you name it. Maybe she didn't want to return home for some reason, but knew she had to, and walked to and fro.
ReplyDeleteIt was absolutely right of you to remove her from danger of being hit by a car, and to call Tetsu who has extensive experience in dealing with elderly people. It is never an easy job, but the police at least have the possibility and power to search for someone identity and take them back to where they belong.
Maybe this lady will never thank you or love you, but God will. Forgive her, because I am sure that in her hysterical state she did not know that everyone wanted her to be safe.
From me, too, Thank you Tanya and Tetsu for looking out for people in need, even if they don't know it themselves.
Queenie
I would have acted just as you did, too many people pass by those who need help. Thank you and Tetsu for being so caring. Irene from N Ireland
ReplyDeleteWhen I read this, I remembered the other times you had been in similar situations. You did the right thing to try to help her. It is good that she managed to find her way home. Hopefully they were able to alert a family member about this so they could see if they can help her.
ReplyDeleteYou did the right thing. You can't imagine what might have happened if you and Tetsu didn't help. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteYou are a wonderful and kind person Tanya. I hope the lady is looked after.
ReplyDeleteMy grandfather had Alzheimers. One Sunday, after church, hubby and I were driving up a street and I saw my grandfather (he'd escaped from his nursing home). We pulled over and offered him a ride. He got in the back of the car, and introduced himself to us. I had to inform him that I was his granddaughter. I still wonder what would have happened if he'd gotten into the 'wrong' car. Thank you for helping that lady. It could be you or me one day.
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