Communication

I finally got an e-mail from Tetsu after a weekend of silence.  I feel like mission control in Houston waiting for Apollo 13 to get back from the orbit from behind the moon and into transmission field again.  Saturday comes and Tetsu disappears into the non-cyber world with no way to get in touch with him and no feedback from him.  Then Monday rolls around and he is back at his office and on his computer again.

Unfortunately the two days of silence doesn't bring much good news.  His mother's condition changes from day to day ever sliding towards poor.  Tetsu feels lost and nothing is in his control anymore.  He says he approaches his visits with low expectations in order not to feel the rush of disappointment when his mother isn't responding or is depressed herself.

I wish I were nearby to offer encouragement though I know when Tetsu is worried he gets short of temper and snappy.  I don't think I'd handle that well and we certainly don't need tensions between us at this time...  Instead, I write Tetsu a long email every night giving him the non-important details of the day.

"Grandma yelled through her bath again today."

 ******

As I wrote a few days ago, my mother and I wrote volumes of letters to each other throughout my 40 years of living in Japan.  After I had children, I wondered what would happen when they were out of the house and living their own lives...  They were getting a Japanese education and they weren't very fluent in English, and I couldn't read or write Japanese!  I worried that they would go on with their lives and we wouldn't be able to communicate with each other!  At least not like my mother and I had always done.

It never occurred to me that the world would change so that we'd have instant face-to-face communication; Facetime and Skype.  It never occurred to me that both children would go to school in the States and end up fluent in both spoken and written English.  It never occurred to me that with the passing of time my Japanese would improve enough so that I could at least read the language and in a pinch write it (with the help of a computer that chooses Chinese characters for me). 

These days one of my few communication challenges is with Tetsu who writes strictly in Japanese while I struggle though the discipline of being supportive and comforting while writing Japanese and Chinese characters.  It is one thing to be able to write

"The dog and the cat run down the street."

and

"I know that you are doing your best with your mom.  Please don't overdo it and wear yourself out.  Please try to find something happy to think about daily.  Remember that Takumi and Leiya and I love you and are concerned for you.  I'll be home soon."

I hope my real message is getting through to him.
 

A fabric card to Japan

I did get a fabric card made for Tetsu's mother, and I did get it sent off.

I gave up on the idea of embroidery and I pawed around an old box of scraps that I'd squirreled away in Grandma's closet.  Hmm...  some scraps of solid fabric that I think I used for Takumi's Dodecahedron quilt last year.  Well, solid fabric would be the easy to use in a collage type card...  Unfortunately I didn't have any Heat-n-Bond or whatever it is called and as I was suddenly in a frenzy wanting to get this card made RIGHT NOW I opted to just cut out shapes and lay them on some plain white fabric.  Usually I would have ironed and bonded my pieces in place but I hoped that my pieces would just stay on the fabric if I free-motioned quilted them down. 

Well, they sort of did as I got the hang of it but as you might guess, I started with that orange flower and the petals shifted.  Too bad!  It will have to do!

I glued the quilted collage down on a regular greeting card that Marcy had, and then put it in an envelope and went off to the post office.

"I really want this card to get to Japan as soon as possible.  How much is it to send Special Delivery?"

"53 dollars."

"What!!!!!  Forget it!  How much to send regular snail mail?"

"$2.95"

Doesn't the price difference seem outlandish to you?  The mail still goes by airplane...  There is maybe a difference of 3 days to 7 days.  It's not like the post office hires a rocket.

My card went out on regular mail.

My children in grade school

Grandma has boxes and boxes and files and files of copies of the letters she wrote to me and of my letters to her over the 40 years that I've lived in Japan.  The boxes seem to overflow into the garage attic even and I know that I have a couple of boxes of her letters to me that I've saved in Japan.  Not long into marriage I'd gotten out of the habit of writing to her and I clearly remember a plea from her asking me to at least send her a postcard once a month so that I didn't go out of her life completely.  It was at that point that I vowed I would write to her every week no matter what.

For many years I would splurge and go to a coffee shop for a few hours to hand write a letter home.  Then I must have brought back a portable typewriter from the States and for many years I typed my letters from home.

With the age of computers I began typing my letters on the computer keyboard and printing them out, and then I entered the age of emailing and I'd email my weekly observations to my brother who would print the pages out for my mother.  All these forms of correspondence are squirreled away in Grandma's boxes and I wonder when anyone will make any sense of it all... or if anyone will ever WANT to make sense of it all... or if the boxes, on this side of the world and in Japan are someday doomed to be thrown out in a dump unopened.  Just the volume of material is daunting and I doubt I'll ever have time to read through it all again.  And if I'm not going to I doubt that either of my children will either...  Marcy suggests scanning everything, but that is a project in itself.

I randomly pulled out a letter from one of the boxes yesterday.  What follows is a rather nice picture of my children when they were in 2nd grade and 6th grade.

"Actually not too much more to report on  Last week I had a parent-teacher conference with Takumi and Leiya's teachers.  They give us 20 minutes to talk with the teacher but since the first 5 minutes are taken up with small talk and formal greetings the rest of the time is rush-rush and probably not too informative.  We were concerned about Leiya's lack of kanji ability (Chinese characters).  She has a terrible time remembering her characters, but the teacher didn't seem to think it very important.  As for school work, her only suggestion (that she gave all the parents I gather) was that Leiya get her times tables memorized before she finished second grade.  Other comments were that Leiya doesn't eat much of her school lunch (I could have guessed that comment was coming because Leiya doesn't eat much of her dinner either.)  She likes rice and fish but won't touch the salads, soups and meat.  Leiya also forgets everything.  Her daily assignment book, her hat, her homework.

"She only turns in a third of her homework."

Yet I'm pretty sure she does her homework because I'm often checking it in the evenings.  It gets lost somewhere between the kitchen table and her backpack. 

Another thing that Leiya's teacher was worried about was that Leiya was always "doing things for other people and letting other people get their way" and so she was concerned that Leiya was feeling stressed out.  One day when they were doing music at school and various instruments were handed out, some girl started whining that she had wanted to play whatever it was that Leiya had, but even when the teacher said no, it was Leiya's turn, Leiya right away handed over the instrument and said she didn't mind.  I guess there have been a few more incidents so that Leiya's teacher even went for advice to some of the other teachers.  I can't say that I noticed though since she mentioned it, Leiya is always washing dishes for Takumi when it is his turn and he doesn't want to; or she often offers to wash his school shoes for him.  She gives him a serving first before herself or if he doesn't have a spoon or glass, she'll get it for him.  I've NEVER seen Takumi do something for Leiya.  Yet they do fight an awful lot so she must not be keeping too much frustration in.  I said to the teacher "well, what do you think we should do?  say 'Leiya, please don't be so nice to people?'"

That seems strange.  I guess we'll just let it ride.

As for Takumi's conference, I went in thinking that his teacher would give me an earful since he's getting cocky and disagreeable at home, but no.  She had not one bad thing to say about him.  I always wonder if she paints such marvelous pictures of all her students to their parents or if she just thinks Takumi is the greatest thing to come to their school.  Really.  She makes me embarrassed by all her praises.  He has the best ideas, works the hardest, is the most cheerful, puts the most effort in relationships, finishes his work the quickest, uses his time to the fullest, is the NICEST brother!

"Whoa!" I said to that one.  He fights with Leiya all the time, makes her cry, spoils her plans, takes advantage of her.  I feel sorry for Leiya when they're together.

"Oh no" she says.  "They were on the same cleanup crew this term" (the whole school gets put into crews for cleaning rooms and bathrooms etc, and the upper grades direct and teach the lower grades).  "He is so patient with all the little children and he does such a good job of showing them what to do and how to do it.  Even with Leiya, he treats her just just the same politeness and patience.  All the teachers comment on what a nice relationship the two of them have."

I came out of that conference thinking we were talking about a different child.  Granted he has said some things recently that make me think he is growing up a bit.  He was telling Leiya one day that even though she may think it was fine to write any old way, when she gets up into 6th grade she'll WANT to write neat and tidily.

"Now that I'm older, I just want to write neatly."

True.  His handwriting has improved 100% or more.  Another interesting comment he made to me was that when he did his book report in America about the Never-Ending Story he thought he had done a pretty good job and was pleased with himself.
 
"But I read that report again the other day and I don't think it's very good.  If I wrote that book report again I could do a much better job."

Ah well, it's nice that he has such support from his teacher...

Well, that was long winded wasn't it.?  Maybe nice for Takumi and Leiya to read.  Don't forget, that this was before middle school when I cried a lot of tears over my children's attitudes...  They definitely weren't perfect children and in fact, I'd forgotten these nice comments and only remember the trials we went through when they were adolescents...

One random letter from the mountain of letters...  What other "treasures" might be in there?
 

Fabric cards

Nothing, absolutely nothing worth writing about.  I should be grateful right?!

I decided to photograph the fabric cards of 2017 that I've been sending to my mother as I'd missed photographing just the fabric ones and had mostly taken photos of the paper and fabric cards together.  Anyway, so that I can make a collage at the end of the year, I needed to get photos of all the cards and I took them off the wall to photograph them.

 Here is the digital collage...

And here they are spread out on Grandma's bed.

I'm thinking of looking through the meager sewing supplies I have collected in Grandma's casita to make another fabric card...  Not for my mother, but I wonder if I have time to make something for Tetsu's mother...  Isn't that a grim thought... "If I have time to..." Not my time, Obaachan's time.  No paper cutting materials here...  I don't know...  I've scrounged around but no embroidery floss either.  I wish I'd thought of this earlier...

I'm racking my brain this morning...  Maybe just send her the photos of Takumi that I took while he was here... If Tetsu hasn't already printed them off for her. 

Anyway, I THINK Grandma has appreciated my cards, I'd hope that Obaachan would too.

Sights on my morning walks

Another slow day.  Marcy and I cleaned out the refrigerator...  How's that for excitement?

I walk along every morning always listening to Audio-books, sometimes carrying my camera.  Just since I've been in California I've finished listening to The Underground Railroad, Living in Christ's Presence, and In Such Good Company.

This morning I passed by the place where I had my downfall (literally) last November when I was here.  This little hill is what Koa and I started up and probably got just past the speed limit sign.  At about that point some dogs came barking at him, they were within their fenced in area, and Koa decided to head back down the hillside running towards home.  And I tried to stop him by digging my heels in, running behind him and then crashing on the pavement.  This is looking up the hill...

And this is looking down the hill.

From this point to home took about 30 minutes (usually a five minute walk) as I balanced myself on wobbly knees all the while trying to keep Koa by my side (I'd gotten a hold of his leash again.)  From there it was another three days confined to Grandma's house with Leiya helping me to the bathroom, a wheelchair assisted plane trip back to Japan and then two weeks in a leg brace with crutches...  I felt very grateful this morning being able to walk up this hill again (minus Koa).

 I see rabbits quite often along my walks...  No coyotes yet...

A lot of dogs bark at me as I go by...  And lots of signs warning off trespassers 

Is this a funny sign?  Maybe yes, maybe no...
 

Fun

Though things are not real fun around here, that doesn't mean we don't try to go out and make some fun.  Takumi and Julieta came on Saturday and we sat in Grandma's casita trying to think of things to do.  In our little town however there is not a lot...

"Do you want to go to the library?  You could get a library card and borrow audio-books."

"Um.  No."

"It is too hot to go out hiking."

"Definitely too hot.  But we didn't bring our swimsuits to go swimming either."

"You could swim in your shorts.  I brought a swimsuit that Julieta could wear."

No response to that suggestion especially after I showed them my motherly swimsuit.

By afternoon Marcy and Keion joined us with the same nothing-to-do expressions.

"Julieta, do you ever do pedicures?  Tani and I have been thinking about going and doing that."

"Yes!  I'd do that.  Let's do it, Takumi!"

"Yeah Takumi!  Guys do it all the time."

"Come on Keion, Let's go get our feet cleaned up."

Takumi looked alarmed.  For Keion it was an absolute no way, he'd rather die.  Too bad for him.  He'll miss out on the fun!

A few minutes later Julieta, Marcy and I danced into the nail salon with Takumi dragging his feet behind us.

"Can you do all four of us?  He's a first timer."

The Vietnamese ladies were all happy and directed us to the nail polish wall.  We assured Takumi that he didn't need to pick out a color for himself... we weren't going to make him do anything embarrassing, but that he could help us with our choices.  And then we all settled down in our chairs to be pampered for about an hour.  The ladies pleasantly asked about our connections...

"Well, he and she and boyfriend, girlfriend.  He and she are son and mother.  She and I are sister-in-laws meaning I'm married to her brother and he's my nephew." 

Confusing...  So we brought out family photos on our iPhones.  And then the iPhones got passed around so that pictures and videos could be taken of Takumi's first pedicure.  Which he found ticklish.

 The lady doing my feet looked up at me and said,

"You a walker.  I can tell."

My feet must be in pretty bad shape...

"How is it Takumi?"

"Pretty nice."

"You want a flower on your toe?  Black flower for men.  No charge."

"No... No thank you.  I'll skip the flower."

So no flowers for any of us but we came home feeling fresh and relaxed.

Fun in the small California town.

Celebrations... frustrations...

Leiya's birthday is today.  Happy Birthday, Leiya!  July is a celebratory month for the Watanabe family.  My birthday, our anniversary, Tetsu's birthday and then Leiya's birthday two days after.  Only Takumi got left out...  I will have to think of a birthday present for Leiya once we are both in Japan. 

Things are still a little too crazy to do any shopping around here but we were able to Facetime with Leiya briefly on Saturday and get to see Tony, her boyfriend who was visiting.  That was probably the best birthday present for Leiya anyway!

*******

While Marcy and I have our hands full with Grandma (she was so out of it this morning...), Tetsu is stressing out too in Japan.  The deed is done and his mother now knows what is going on and why she isn't getting better.  Poor, poor Tetsu.  I doubt as if I'd have been any help at all with the relating of such news but I might have provided hot cups of coffee in the mornings or at least a well lit house to return to at night.  Emotions and situations change hourly with both of us and it is hard to tell who needs the most bolstering though I am so ever grateful that Marcy and I can stand together on decision making here in California.  Tetsu is basically facing his worries alone.  He appreciates Takumi and Leiya and my emails to him almost daily (though his iPad seems to have stumped him completely and we are relying on his office computer for correspondence.) 

The past few days with Grandma have been frustrating because at every chance she takes her diapers off and you know what THAT means for clean-up.  It is hard not getting upset and I bite back the words "Why do you keep doing that?  Leave the diapers alone!"  She doesn't understand, she can't help it but still, every couple of hours I check and the diapers are often off again.  Marcy and I consulted with the bath nurse this morning and we will with the regular nurse who comes tomorrow...  But what can be done except to suggest a pill to make Grandma sleep through the night...  And neither Marcy and I want Grandma drugged...  According to Marcy this is a new development since I arrived and there is no telling how long this "phase" is going to last.  While I am here I can cover the nights and get up every two hours to check but once I'm gone I really don't see how Marcy is going to handle Grandma's new "phase".   But I know I've said that before.  The family always seems to cope without me.

Marcy and I both crashed out after Grandma's bed bath this morning.  More cries and noises which are very stressful to witness and hear.  I wonder if Carol crashed out afterwards too.

"What's going on?"

Well, the family had a rousing wake-up this morning thanks to me...

I woke up earlier than usual and thought I might make this the day I walk to the top of the hillside to take a picture of the sunrise.  Sometimes the mornings are beautiful and the clouds in the sky will reflect the arriving sun.  Unfortunately I need to be at the top of the hill by the dawn which means getting out of the house when things are barely distinguishable along the walk...  I do this walk only once a year...

Grandma heard me use the bathroom and as she was awake I decided to give her a quick change right then...  There was a "fragrance" in the room already so it wasn't a job to be delayed.  I turned on the light...

GASP!  Diapers mostly off, soaked through and through and worse, sheets sopping and ANTS!!!!!  It was the ants the pushed me over the edge.  NIGHTMARE!!!!!  I threw off the blanket getting protests from Grandma because now she was cold.  The ants were crawling all over her!  And now over me!!!!  This was major freak-out time for me.

I raced over to the main house hoping my early rising brother was awake, but as it is Sunday the house was quiet except for someone taking a shower in the front bathroom.  Hmmm  Marcy?  my brother?  I decided to let whoever finish their shower and considered that if I could just get the sheets off the bed I was already pretty good at changing and washing Grandma.  I raced back to Grandma and considered changing her ants and all, or getting her out of the bed and doing the sheets first.  I tried getting her up and moving her to the wheelchair alone.  Lots of moans and groans and "what are we doing?"  Trying to pull her to a sitting position only made her yelp that I was hurting her wrists (gripping too tightly as she wouldn't hold on to me.)  This was an impossible task for me alone though I had watched Carol do it three times a week.  I plopped Grandma back on the soppy, "it's COLD!", ant infested bed and went back to the main house.  Someone was still in the shower.

"Marcy?  Are you up?  Keion?  Are you in the shower?"  I loudly whispered to the bathroom door.

"What's going on?"  It was Kiana coming out of HER bedroom and who had heard me in the hallway.

"Everything is fine.  I just need your mother or your dad.  Do you think your dad is in the shower?"

"No.  It's not him.  He uses the other shower.  Mom?  Are you in the shower?  Mom?!"

"What's going on?  I'm not Mom."  It was Colin in the shower...  At this time of morning!

"What's going on?"  Now Marcy's brother who sleeps in the living room was up.

"Nothing is wrong.  Grandma has a problem.  No...  It isn't a big problem.  I just need Marcy to help me get her out of bed."

Kiana finally stuck her head into the Marcy and Keion's bedroom and woke up Marcy who came out like a bullet with her eyes still closed.

"What's going on?  What happened?  Is Grandma okay?"

"Grandma is fine but she is covered in ants!!!  I don't know what to do!"

I continued to babble and explain and together Marcy and I assessed the situation and in an orderly fashion removed diapers and cleaned Grandma up, removed her nightgown, threw the sheets and blanket and pillowcase out the back door, alcohol wiped the plastic mattress (rolling Grandma side to side), got new bedding on the bed, wiped down the table and walls where the ants were marching in line and bug sprayed the window sills and room moulding.  There was no food left out last night and no more than the usual crumbs that Grandma spills when eating...  And those ants were headed for her diapers!!!  Yuck!!!  What IS going on?

Grandma enjoyed the attention, wasn't aware of any ants (we were still picking them out of the diapers as we changed her!) and laughed and hooted at Marcy's and my antics.  I apologized profusely to Marcy for calling "emergency" at a rather small problem that maybe I could have figured out on my own... (why did I think Grandma needed to be moved to the wheelchair?  I'm perfectly capable of rolling her back and forth in bed)

Marcy waved my apologies away as she returned to bed and as I headed out for my walk...  Too late to meet the sunrise but I went to the top of the hill anyway.  It is a foggy day anyway and no sun to be seen.  I will make the rest of my rounds today apologizing for waking up everyone, except my brother, on this Sunday sleep-in morning.

What a start to the day.

Art?

I'm still not doing much.  Maybe today when I see Takumi again.

So...  I have just wandered around Grandma's casita and taken photos of the "art" that she has on her walls. The whole place is flooded with knick-knacks and photos but with nothing much else to blog about I thought I'd tell the stories behind what she has looked at for many years.

Starting at the wall next to the entry steps to Grandma's two room casita, Grandma has a large painting of... koi fish.  By.... Leiya!  Leiya was an art major in college awakening to her talents in high school.  She had to submit quite a lot of paintings and drawings most of which she has gotten rid of in her many moves since.  I wanted her to save SOMETHING for her family but the paintings are too large to get back to Japan.  Marcy has an abstract in her house and Grandma took the koi fish painting.  Unfortunately, Leiya doesn't get much time to paint much any more.

Above the huge wooden desk in the casita (it was my grandfather's... made from a courthouse door) is a medium size charcoal, Japanese ink-and-brush painting.  None of these things have names or dates on them so I have no idea of who painted this.  I remember it being in my parent's bedroom for years..  It is a painting of two cranes sitting on a tree branch...  But I'VE always seen a dog head looking up into the sky...  Now you'll always see it that way too...  The peacock feather there was one I picked up from a neighbor's yard on one of my early morning walks.  The neighbor keeps peacocks running and flying free in his yard.

The focal point of the whole casita and before that the living room of the main house, is a large Japanese screen made of silk.  Not long after I went to Japan I decided I wanted to buy my parents a Japanese screen for their 25 wedding anniversary.  I think I even took the 6 hour train ride back into Tokyo where screens were more available for tourists to purchase and I spent many hours looking at designs and then choosing this one and a size that would fit on a wall (a large wall).  Shipping must have been included (this was nearly 40 years ago... I don't really remember) and the screen arrived for my parents anniversary.  My mother loved the screen... even though my father walked out on her two months later...  So much for THAT celebration!  The beautiful gold screen has always held a place on honor and visitors often comment on it.  See!  I knew my mother's tastes, if not my father's...

Over my mother's bed is a smallish copy of a woodblock print... probably from a calendar, of the Last Supper by a famous Christian artist Sadao Watanabe.  I must have sent back one of the calendars that were printed on washi paper and my mother had it framed.

I've made my mother two or three bedsize quilts but this is a smallish quilt made from a Paper Panache pattern... and one of my first attempts at paper piecing.  It doesn't match anything else in the room but is cheery...  I still have the pattern in my sewing room.  I should try it again in different colors.

Making a detour to the very small bathroom in Grandma's casita, the only art I can find there is a small enamel piece, again of birds, and a cat night light that Marcy gave Grandma.  Grandma's own sleeping cat and birds!  (see post about the famous Sleeping Cat at the Toshogu Shrine.)

I've already shown this painting above Grandma's dresser.  Below it hang my monthly fabric cards.  I have no idea where this painting came from but it does depict my mother's love of things oriental.

And this is a quilt I made just a couple of years ago when Grandma was first becoming housebound and then bed-bound.  I brought along one of McKenna's art quilt patterns that I had been given and because Grandma used to like to watch the humming birds in the yard I spent the summer cutting out the pieces and making the art quilt while she watched.  It hangs within view of Grandma's bed.

Just looking at these photos I can see that Grandma has always liked birds and things oriental... 

Not much going on...

I guess we've decided that Grandma is no longer up to taking showers... 

Ever since I arrived, Grandma makes a lot of noise when Carol the bath nurse, comes to get her up.  Marcy had told me it was par for the course and that Carol knows what she is doing and that Grandma makes more noise when someone else is in the room.  So I stopped hovering and just went somewhere else where I couldn't hear Grandma making noises about being afraid she was going to fall or that the water was too hot or too cold or that she didn't feel well sitting up.  Carol too had told me that all her other patients were now being bathed in bed so Grandma was actually doing good...

But Grandma was unhappy about her shower more than usual today and Carol suggested that we have extra handrails installed in the bathing area.  I went and got Marcy so that we could all discuss where the handrails might be placed but Grandma then wouldn't budge from the seat she was on in the shower and finally with the three of us we got her back in the wheelchair.  Carol finally said that we could just forget the handrails and that it would be easier on Grandma to just be bathed in bed...  So that is what she will do from Monday.

I guess it is sort of an inevitable and predictable progression of events yet it seems like another step of defeat...  Grandma doesn't see it that way of course.  She'll just be happy she doesn't have to get up and get maneuvered into the shower anymore.

*********** 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TETSU!

Today is Tetsu's birthday, at least it is in Japan where they are 17 hours ahead.  I had already bought him a new belt that he needed and had him open his present before I left.  I wasn't sure he was going to be in the mood for a surprise present (I hide them away sometimes when I'm not with him) on his birthday this year.  We also missed our 37th wedding anniversary this year with me already in the States on the date.  When planning our wedding 37 years ago I guess we didn't give any consideration to the possibility that we'd be apart from each other most summers...  Not much we could do about the birthday.  And Leiya's is coming up in a few days too!

So, not much going on.  My walks in the morning are becoming longer as I find that I just sit and read or listen to audio-books most of the rest of the day and don't get any steps in.  I now walk about an hour and a half every morning.  We all spent one evening wandering through Ikea and that gave me a good number of steps though not any purchases that I would be able to carry back to Japan.

The sunset was nice!

The weekend

I think I missed posting about Takumi visiting me this weekend.  We had dinner out together (he takes ME out these days!) and he advised me on computer and iPhone things.  AND he brought me a birthday present!  A photograph printer set!  A small little thing that probably won't be a big deal to take back with me to Japan.

The big deal is learning to use the printer and Takumi guided me through the steps of installing the device on my computer and setting up Wi-fi and explaining how I'll have to do it again when I get to my own Wi-fi in Japan.  CAN I REMEMBER ALL THE STEPS?!

I was most impressed by the printer system which does not work with ink but with film... but not film like in old cameras... film with the primary colors that somehow arrange themselves onto the glossy paper.  Take my word for it.  Technology that throws out the old way of thinking and starts anew!  

So, with Takumi by my side we printed out photos from my camera with a memory stick.  We printed out photos from my camera using Wi-fi.  We printed out selfies from my iPhone.  We printed out photos scanned from years ago.  We "wasted" a lot of paper and printing film for me to understand the process and order of things.

"Let's see...  I want to print a photo from my computer which is already in Cloud.  I first disconnect my iPhone Wi-fi with the house and set it to the printer Wi-fi.  Do I go to Photos in my iPhone?  No.  I choose the printer app on my iPhone.... I choose the photo.  I make sure the paper is in place and I click print...  Yeah!  A photo!"

This worked well with Takumi grinning by my side and letting me make my own mistakes as I verbally went through the steps.  I tried it again yesterday ALL BY MYSELF and though I did get a photo out of the process I need to rethink the photo size and direction the next time.  You do realize that I am writing all these details down so that I can look back on this blog post and remind myself of the steps next time...

 **********

Grandma is fine and eats well.  Her bath nurse comes three times a week and though Grandma doesn't much like getting up to take a shower the job gets done.  A regular nurse comes twice a week but there are rarely any changes and it is always a routine check of Grandma's vitals.  I suppose as patients deteriorate the job becomes more involved but so far with Grandma it is only a token recording of measurements and numbers.

On the other side of the Pacific, Tetsu is going through trials and upheavals.  Obaachan weakens though she still has conversations with him.  She asked him to do her laundry for her as Tetsu's sister hadn't been able to help out for a couple of days.  Tetsu was overjoyed to be able to DO something for his mother rather than just watch over and commiserate.  In Japan, patients still use their own blankets and towels and underclothes etc. so the washing builds up over a couple of days.  Tetsu has always been a great at doing laundry...  I mean, we DO have a washing machine, but it is basically Tetsu's job to start the machine and hang up the wash even when I am around (Remember... no dryer).

Tetsu and I write long e-mails to each other daily.  On my side I relate conversations with my mother, on his, what the doctor has said and how his mother's condition has changed.  This is a big difference from past years when we wrote to each other two or three times just to touch base and let the other person know we were thinking of them.  Tetsu's e-mails have always been so dry and rote.  

"How are you, Tani?  How is your mother?  How are Keion and Marcy and family?  I am fine.  I love you.  Please give my regards to everyone.  Love Tetsu."

I one time complained that I got no INFORMATION from Tetsu's e-mails.  I wanted to know what was going on and not just read the set phrases.  The next e-mail I got from him was,

"How are you, Tani?  How is your mother?  How are Keion and Marcy and family?  I am fine.  The newscaster of channel 5 died.  I love you.  Please give my regards to everyone.  Love Tetsu."

Well...  I guess I got some information that time...

This year is different and I wake up and open G-mail to find a long page of Tetsu's thoughts and feelings and uncertainties.  I am sure it takes him quite awhile to write it all.  I know it takes me nearly an hour to write back to him daily too.  It is all we can do for each other when we really need to be together at such times...

 

History

Yesterday morning, my brother, Marcy and I went up to Idyllwild to the mountain cabin my brother owns.  The drive up is about an hour and a half.  Our stay there was a mere 45 minutes.  But even 45 minutes gave me lots of memories...

Getting to the cabin we have to drive through Moreno Valley.

My brother and I remember the drive as long and tiring but that must have been childhood perception.

I think I was around 11 when my parents bought this old cabin in the mountains.  Even back then the cabin was already heralded as being 80 years old and had been built in the days when people had drivers to drive them places.  The cabin consists of an acre of land very close to the town with a combination woodshed and tool shed and a "chauffeur" cabin for the original family's driver. 
The cabin was fully furnished when my parents bought it, filled with a sagging horsehair sofa, built in blanket chests and a huge stone fireplace.  The original cabin had only been one room but a kitchen had been built on, a bedroom, two bathrooms and a wrap-around porch that was later walled in.  There were beds and fold up beds and bookshelves filled with old books and ancient Reader's Digests.

The charm of the cabin for me was there was no TV, no radio and no telephone.  Charm or not, there was also no hot water nor refrigerator nor stove except for a hulking black wood burning stove in the corner of the kitchen.

In the town of Idyllwild there were/are churches and gift shops and a library and a doctor but no hospital.  There is an elementary school but no middle school nor high school so students have to be bussed down the mountain.  A fire station, a ranger station... a very expensive grocery store and a Rustic (really rustic!) movie theater.  In my childhood my brother and I looked forward to arriving in Idyllwild and glimpsing the theater poster board to find out what was showing that weekend.  The next night we would walk from the cabin to the theater for a movie viewing.  They were almost always child appropriate.

I loved the library.  I loved browsing the gift stores buying little ceramic knick-knacks of cats and squirrels and deer.  Generic gift store merchandise that seemed special in the mountain surroundings.  Children, and sometimes my mother, hiked up to Taquitz Peak a three or four hour hike, at first stopping at the ranger station for a hiking permit...  it made the hike seem adventurous and daunting thinking that the ranger needed to be aware if we got lost in the wilds.... Our goal was to get our Squirrel Cards when we reached the look-out tower.

For two or three years my brother and I went to the ISOMATA summer day camp learning about art and nature.  ISOMATA stands for Idyllwild School Of Music And The Arts and in those days was run by the University of Southern California.  We made God's Eyes and put on plays about tree elves, we modeled clay and made instruments of nuts and bowls.  A thoroughly delightful childhood experience!

Idyllwild was the one and only time I got a scolding from a policeman when we children were reported for throwing snowballs at passing cars from the Catholic Church steps.  I remember being terrified that I would be labeled a criminal for life when it had never occurred to me that I could be a danger to cars. 

There have been some changes to the cabin over the years.  Hauling ice to the ice box in the dark pantry became too much of a chore (though I appreciate the memories of those pioneer days) and there is an ancient refrigerator on the indoor porch now.  The wood burning stove is only a decoration now and the family uses a gas stove from the era of the ancient refrigerator. 

The new generation can't live without a TV and so last year my brother's old flat screen TV got hauled up to the cabin along with a trove of dusty videos and DVD's.  I inwardly seethed at the TV addition.  THAT doesn't belong in this cabin!!!  The fireplace looks old but in one of the Southern California earthquakes 15 or 20 years ago, original fireplace crumbled and the family had to find a craftsman who could do the stonework using the original stones.  The width of the fireplace is actually quite a bit smaller than the original.

My own grandfather, my mother's father, lived up in the cabin for a week or two alone one summer and he tried to at least paint over the stains in the ceiling board discovering that there was no ladder that reached the top most corners.  So the kitchen ceiling has remained half painted for nearly 50 years... New stains too I see, though my brother and friends re-tarred the roof about 10 years ago.

I think someone who appreciated antiques would be excited to look at all the old do-dads around the cabin... 

The two claw foot tubs that leak when in use...

The Indian basket over the doorway.  Actually I'm not sure if that is an antique or not... Maybe a gift-shop acquisition but I do recall old dusty baskets in the back of the closet... 

In my childhood I never thought twice about this mirror though nowadays I cringe at the antlers...  It was all part of the decor.

The deer head too makes me shudder and I dislike the display of... what... hunting? human superiority?  But I have to admit that the deer-head looks at home here and the long forgotten deer has watched over the cabin's owners for 120 some years.  Thank you deer.

The horse hair sofa has been replaced by another cast away sofa set...  the heater in the corner doesn't work as Takumi found out when he visited at Christmas.  The cabin has no insulation and my brother spent some time filling in woodpecker holes in the bedroom wall.  Now there are only a few spots where we can look straight outside through the wall!

And these are the curtains that Marcy wants replaced.  We counted 20 panels for the closed in porch, wrapping around two corners.  They are not long and are really only burlap...  They are probably the originals and are stained from water damage from a leaking roof and from woodpecker holes.  Good thing that this is desert country and that there is not much rain!

A lot of photos for 45 minutes, right?  I came home wishing I could just STAY in the cabin for a couple of weeks with brooms and rags and a hammer and nails and maybe some paint.  I'd sew up curtains and Indian looking quilts for the beds and get rid of the plastic tablecloth and TV!!!  I'd rake pine needles and set up a bird feeder and buy peanuts for the squirrels so that they'd visit daily.  I'd get a rustic outdoor lawn set so that I could read and drink coffee outside and I'd cook different types of soups and stews daily.  I'd walk the cool mornings and hike the mountain streams only a block away.  I guess I'd have to put in wi-fi though... I'm not a complete mountain girl.